It’s probably damn obvious if you’re dating a domme (because we work hard to build informed consent), but if you ever need to Scooby Doo together the clues, here’s a few subtler signs that your girlfriend is a dominatrix…

1. She uses a leather cuff connector as a carabiner for her key chain.

2. She always carries a giant backpack (probably containing: leather, rope, dry shampoo, fishnets).

3. She was buying Cavicide and Hibiclens even before COVID.

4. She pretends to be an accountant at cocktail parties and knows enough about LLCs to be convincing.

5. She can tie more knots than an Eagle Scout.

6. She has an entire 2nd wardrobe consisting of complicated strappy harnesses, lacy scraps of lingerie, leather, PVC, and other gorgeous fiddly handwash-only pieces.

7. She wears nice boots—whether they’re Docs, Pleasers, or Wesco.

8. She’s damn good at improv and MacGyvering.

9. She goes through black nitrile gloves faster than a tattoo shop.

10. She has great playlists, often in 30 min/1 hour increments.

As with everything in life, the only way to really know is to ask directly, but if the list above sounds familiar it’s likely your girlfriend is a dominatrix.

Good luck—& give her our contact info,
S + M

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